Welcome everyone, to the very first of the weekly editions of this blog. Today, I’ll be looking back into the deep past and exploring where my current stances and opinions on body autonomy and sexual freedom got their start. In the Cartel Incorporated universe, James and his friends stumble upon a populace that has been free to grow and evolve naturally, without the controlling spectre of religious institutions or special interest groups curtailing their development. This idea is very central to my current philosophy, as while I was growing up, I was subjected to a wide spectrum of controlling interests thanks to some misguided parenting, and the general fear of the unknown that underscored the eighties.
As a kid, my imagination ruled my life, and I spent a lot of time exploring places I wasn’t supposed to, reading comic books about amazing other worlds, and early on I was exposed to the world of online computing in the form of the Commodore 64 and BBS systems. This didn’t really sit well with my conservative parents, whose plans for me leaned closer to a legal or medical future than one of expression. Because of this, there were many misguided attempts to try to figure out what was wrong with me, and how to fix it so I would fit the mould they had envisioned. Pastors, reverends, social workers, teachers, and even the good old church of Scientology had a swing at me to try and get me to fall in line, but every time I made it through the wringer, I just came out stronger in my convictions that who I was was just fine, and they were barking up the wrong tree trying to change me.
I’m inquisitive. I love finding out new stuff and experimenting with things I know nothing about. Add to that the list of things all the churches tell you not to do, and you get someone who revels in the taboo at every chance. That set me up for a few things in my adult life.
In my twenties, my roommate and I ran an underground bar out of our apartment, and in the process made many friends of the female persuasion. It was my first taste of ethical non-monogamy, and would set the stage for the rest of my life so far. By my late thirties, I had moved on to actually working at a local swingers club as the cook, trading my services for free admission to the parties. I still have many of the friends I made during those years, and I can say without hesitation that people who live the “lifestyle”, as it’s called, are some of the most honest and reliable human beings on the planet.
The pandemic came soon after I got myself out of a bad relationship and completely stopped me from socializing with anyone outside of a small bubble for a couple of years. This year though, I’ve come out of my shell a little and begun testing the same social waters. On the weekend, I decided to check out a new club (to me), and boy was I in for a surprise. While socializing was the name of the game at the old clubs I used to frequent, the new order of the day seems to dispense with the formalities as most of the folks there were looking for hookups right off the bat. For the first time in a very long time, I felt anxious and out of my element. It was intimidating, and though the club had hard rules on consent that everyone stuck to like glue, I still had a hard time relaxing enough to enjoy it at all. If I’m going to write about things like sexual freedom, I think I had better get my shit together and get over the butterflies quick.
So I’m gonna get over it. It’s new, and it’s scary, but so was all of the shit I had to get through to have some of the best times I’ve ever had in my life.